


A Rose By Any Other Name

by foxtwin



Category: Ghostbusters (movie)
Genre: Gen, Yuletide, challenge:Yuletide 2008, recipient:greenlily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-12-18
Updated: 2008-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-04 15:24:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxtwin/pseuds/foxtwin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An old nemesis returns and wreaks havoc at the Ghostbusters' headquarters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Rose By Any Other Name

  
Fandom: [Ghostbusters (movie)](http://yuletidetreasure.org/get_fandom_quicksearch.cgi?Fandom=Ghostbusters%20\(movie\))

 

Written for: greenlily in the Yuletide 2008 Challenge

by [foxtwin](http://yuletidetreasure.org/cgi-bin/contact.cgi?filename=66/arose)

Thanks to: htbthomas for the beta. This is my second yuletide fic, and my first Ghostbusters attempt.

* * *

"She finally called it quits, Venkman." Raymond Stantz, shaking his head in disbelief, handed the note to his colleague, Peter Venkman.

"It was bound to happen," Peter intoned in an I-told-you-so way.

Egon Spengler, striding up behind them both, glanced at the note and shook his head.

"This isn't good, Ray." Egon's matter of fact tone forced the effervescent Peter to look at a brighter side.

"Cheer up, Ray," Peter said. "I mean, how long did you think it would last? A month? A year?"

"It's a wonder it lasted as long as it did," Egon added.

"Personally, I gave it two months," Peter added as an aside.

"I was kinda hoping that, well, it would last...you know...a lifetime," Ray said, eyes misting in fond recollection. Then, looking from side to side at his colleagues, Ray added, "You know we were meant for each other, right? From the beginning. I even said so, didn't I?"

"Yes, Ray," Peter nodded, eyes shutting in affirmation. "Yes, you did." Peter patted his pal on the shoulder good naturedly, then put his arm around his friend.

"A human life's a long time, Ray," Egon added. "Statistically speaking. These things usually don't last more than 30 years...give or take."

"Still. Thirty years is at least a generation," Ray said. "You'd think it would have lasted at least that long." Ray looked to Egon for some confirmation, but none came. Ray's shoulders slumped.

Peter, however, remained upbeat. Hugging his friend a little closer to him, Peter said, "You'll find a new one, Ray. You'll waltz right up to her, give her that big hug, and the rest will be history." Peter could be matter of fact. But his tone was less enthusiastic than Ray had hoped.

"I'm not so sure, Venkman," Ray said wiping a tear from his eye. "She was... she was one of a kind. The way she wobbled when you rode her; the way she made you feel when you slid your body along her thin..."

"We get the idea, Ray," Egon said. "We _are_ talking about the fire pole after all. Right?"  
Peter passed the note, which had been signed by Janine and Scotch-taped to the doors, back to Ray. Winston, who had been driving the Ghostbusters' modified hearse, honked the horn.

"What the hell!?" Winston yelled out of the window. "Are we gonna park this damn car today, or am I gonna have to wait until Jesus comes back?!" As Winston pulled his head into the car, he muttered to himself, "And he can't come too damn soon, if you ask me."

Ray and Peter quickly opened the carport for Winston. A rush of wind blew them back onto Ecto One's hood, plastering them and their gear against the windshield.

"What was that?" Ray asked innocently after the minute-long guster.

"I don't know, Ray. I don't know." Peter nodded his head toward the pole inside. "But I've got a feeling it's about that girl of yours."

* * *

The car stayed parked outside the building as the four Ghostbusters carefully, meticulously entered their headquarters. Their heavy nuclear packs, their primary weapon against ghouls and specters, were still on their backs.

The entire place was a wreck. Every one of the six filing cabinets in Janine's office had been opened, with paperwork strewn all over the place. Ectoplasm was everywhere. Ray's pole was still somewhat upright, but the base of it had been clearly mangled. It no longer had its shiny sheen or rigid structure.

"I'm gonna have to tell our secretary to make sure she cleans up her room," Peter said to no one in particular.

Egon, wading through the morass of papers, walked up to the pole. "She's rusted, Ray. Looks like some acid ate through the base of the pole."

Winston, taking a look at the ectoplasm-oozing filing cabinets, nodded his head. "These are rusted too."

Peter, having made his way to Janine's desk, grimaced as he noticed the dribbling ectoplasm covering the desk, chair and computers. With gloves on, Peter daintily lifted up a small can of paper clips she kept there.

"You didn't accidentally turn on the humidifier this morning, did you, Ray? Or blow your nose without a Kleenex?"

Ray ignored Peter's comment, focusing instead on Egon's scientific analysis. "Rust. Just like the Great Engine Crisis of 1848," Ray murmured.

"Engine crisis?" Peter was mildly amused and looked at his colleague over the desk.

"Good thing we kept the car outside, then," Winston shot back, leaving the filing cabinet and finding Ray and Egon inspecting the rusted pole. "I just _replaced_ that engine, and I ain't about to spend another grand on that pile of crap."

"Steam Engine Crisis, to be precise," Ray said, looking back over his shoulder at Peter. "Thirteen steam trains built by Phineas J. Stempf were put into service on the B&amp;O lines in March, 1848. The engines were said to be haunted, so no engineer would take `em. And it's a good thing too, as every last Stempf engine was found to have rusted through. No one knows why they did, though. They thought it was sabotage, but when Stempf's competitors began finding their engines rusted through, folks started wondering if there was, you know, a ghost with an attitude spreading some mischief."

"Nice story, Ray. Sounds like the guy was a little rusty," Peter smart-alecked.

"Yeah," Ray said.

"I'm not sure that your rust ghost was to blame, Ray," Egon said. "Some of the ectoplasm I've analyzed looks very familiar. Like the same stuff I found on Peter when we went to that hotel our first night out."

"You mean...?" Ray stammered.

"Looks like that green vapor that got Peter has a memory."

"Hold on a second," Peter wasn't grasping the logic. "Egon - are you telling me that the little slime ball we locked up, and then had to release, is coming back home?"

"Worse," Egon said. "It looks like that vapor actually ate Ray's pole."

"What do you mean, _ate_?" Peter said.

"The chemical attributes of the ectoplasm suggested our vaporous apparition liked to dine on just about anything. But it looks like lately he's been eating things that are corrosive."

"Damn," Winston said, rubbing his hand through his hair. "Like, what are we talking about?"

"Chlorine tablets, ammonia, disinfectant. Your basic household cleaners, mostly." Egon's assessment was monotone, as usual.

"What?" Peter said. "That little slimeball? He used to eat hotdogs, and cake, and pudding."

"Yeah. Poor guy," Ray said. "I wonder what happened?"

As if in answer to the question, the green vaporous apparition - the same slimy creature that attacked Peter on their first real job - made his presence known from the legs of Janine's desk. As the apparition floated through it, the metal leg collapsed, causing the desk to tilt to one side.

Already primed for action, Ray was the first to snatch his wand and aim his beam at Janine's desk, obliterating the metallic structure in an explosive stream of energy that lasted just a touch longer than it took Peter and Egon to track the apparition.

"I think you got it, Ray," Peter said.

With the smug expression of a Wild West Sheriff having felled his nemesis, Ray blew on the nozzle of his wand.

"The desk, I mean," Peter corrected.

"That slimeball is still on the loose, Ray," Egon said. "Probably floated upstairs through the hole."

Winston, readying his gear, waved Ray ahead. "After you."

Taking the cue, Ray cautiously moved forward to the fire door and the steps that led upward beyond it. Peter moved in as a cautious second, with Winston close behind. Egon, looking behind them all, covered the rear.

In the stairwell leading upward, Ray inspected the scene. Slime and ooze dotted the walls, evidence that the vaporous spectre was still at large. Ray fumbled for a cigarette, only to have Peter swipe it from his lips.

"No smoking on the job," Peter said. "Unless, of course, we're smoking that slimeball."

"You're right, Venkman." With resolve, Ray ascended the stairs. Floating high above them in the stairwell, the apparition swept back and forth, rusting and corroding the copper and steel pipes that were the headquarters' lifeblood. Steam spewed through the corroded pipes and into the stairwell, dousing the Ghostbusters and forcing a retreat.

* * *

Back in the lobby, Ray grabbed for a cigarette again and lit it before a pacing Peter could snatch it away.

"Well, looks like the stairs are a no-go," Peter finally said. "Any suggestions?"

"A rope ladder might work," Egon offered. "If we had one, that is."

Pausing mid-puff, Ray added: "We could go through the roof."

Peter, not hearing anything better, gave Ray the nod. "The roof then."

Outside, the fire escape was extremely rickety and obviously had been neglected over the years.

"You go first, Ray," Peter said authoritatively.

Ray, apprehensive now as he'd led the last charge, looked to Egon. The stolid scientist merely shook his head, as if to indicate he wouldn't lead under any circumstances. Ray looked at Winston. But the junior Ghostbuster merely urged Ray forward with a disarming smile and a small gesture toward the fire escape.

It took Ray a minute or two - and a boost from Peter and Winston - to get his rotund figure onto the rickety contraption. The fire escape moved wildly first right, then left, as Ray held on for dear life.

"Go get `im, Ray!" Peter yelled up to his friend. "We're right behind you."

Emboldened, Ray ascended to the next step, then the next. Peter, boosted up next, was ready to assist Ray. Egon, tall and fit enough to boost himself, followed, if only to get a fresh sampling of ectoplasm.

As they continued to ascend, Winston watched from below as bolts meant to hold the fire escape to the building were coming loose. "Hey!" he yelled. "Be careful up there!" Ray, in response, waved back as if to say that everything was fine.

But all was not well. The Ghostbusters, now halfway up the fire escape, did not get much further before the bulbous green apparition began to hover above the fire escape. The vapor caught sight of Ray and smiled grotesquely. Peter recognized that grin. It was not a grin he appreciated.

"Ray," he said calmly. "We need to get out of here, Ray."

"Right," Ray said.

Egon, understanding the situation, began slowly descending the fire escape. Peter followed even more carefully. Ray took another glance, as if to make sure not to lose sight of their target. The moment's glance turned into a staring contest. By this time, Peter and Egon had made it to the bottom.

The blob continued its staring contest with a hideous, threatening grin.

"Come on, Ray!" Peter urged more loudly than he preferred. "Leave that thing, and get down from there!"

Ray was unmoved.

"Ray," Egon shouted. "Come down now!"

It was Egon's voice that broke the spell. Ray looked away and down, and gave a thumbs up.

Then the slimy apparition attacked.

Ray, adrenaline pumping, descended the steps of the fire escape trying in vain to scramble to Peter and Egon, who had waited for their friend before jumping off the rickety structure. The slimy, corrosive-filled apparition floated down and streaked over the fire escape, cutting through the rusty, neglected fire escape like a knife through an orange. Egon and Peter jumped to safety next to Winston, who quickly moved them back toward the headquarters' entrance. But the damage done by the apparition caused the fire escape to collapse, with Ray on it. The lone Ghostbuster held onto the structure for dear life as it crashed upon the ground, buckled and spread itself on the sidewalk below. Shaken, Ray emerged from the rubble with shock and disappointment on his face.

Winston looked up. The apparition, still floating where the fire escape once was, smiled even more broadly and threw itself back into the building.

Turning to Ray, Winston pointed up at the place where the fire escape once stood. "I hate that son-of-a-bitch," Winston said, spitting every word. "And damned if I'm gonna let that blob of lime Jell-O get the best of my friends!"

* * *

The Ghostbusters were armed and ready to do battle. Winston led them back into the headquarters with resolve. They were not disappointed. As they approached the office area, Ray caught sight of the green apparition popping C batteries into its mouth like candy.

"Venkman," Ray said in hushed tones, pointing Peter to the actions of the apparition.

"Those were for my stereo," Peter said. "Nobody messes with my tunes and gets away with it."

A nod from Peter set all four Ghostbusters on automatic. Four simultaneous streams of energy popped out of four nozzles, and gave the apparition an immediate shock. The apparition, keen now to the whereabouts of the Ghostbusters, flew up and to the right. But Egon, judging the trajectory of the green ghost, changed angles and forced the apparition back toward Peter and slightly to the left of Janine's rusted file cabinet. Winston, noting the shift in Egon's stream and the possible danger of crossing his stream with it, pulled out completely, then relaunched his stream toward the filing cabinet, which exploded into chunks of charred metal and debris. Spooked (if a ghost can indeed be spooked), the apparition jumped right into Ray's stream and was caught. Egon and Peter joined Ray's hold and prepared the trap. Within a matter of minutes, the apparition that had caused all the afternoon's havoc had been captured. It was the matter of another few minutes, and the apparition became part of the vault housing all captured spectres.

As Ray, Egon, Peter and Winston went back upstairs, Janine came through the door and stopped. Janine's hands went straight to her hips as she noted the papers strewn everywhere, the combusted desk, the obliterated cabinet and the generally disheveled look about the office.

"What the hell happened here?" she asked seriously, looking each one of the Ghostbusters up and down. "If you wanted to see the files, you could have just asked!"

None of them, especially Peter, had the heart to tell Janine what had really happened.

* * *

"Do you think there are any more like her?" Ray asked. He and Peter were alone in the headquarters office a week after having dealt with their slimy green nemesis. The clean-up had been prolonged as a new fire escape had to be installed and files, torched by the nuclear reactors, had to be replaced. "I mean, she was one of a kind."

"I don't know, Ray." Peter pulled a small piece of paper Janine had given him before she left for home. "Says they're bringing in a new one for you to look at this morning."

"I wonder what she'll be like," Ray mused.

"Probably like all the rest."

Ray went back to cleaning up Janine's office, while Peter began sweeping up some left-over debris.

Just then, the headquarters' bay doors opened revealing Ecto One. But there was no sign of a pole anywhere. Right behind them, a huge semi pulled up. The semi's driver came in.

"Delivery for Dr. Raymond Stantz?"

Ray looked at Peter. "I'm Dr. Stantz."

"Yeah. Well, I got a twisted one for you. They say you want it installed?"

Peter nodded his head in a reassuring way. Ray gulped.

"Yeah. I guess so."

"Well," the driver said. "You wanna look at it first?"

Ray's palms began to sweat. A slide -- the spiral kind often seen in neighborhood playgrounds -- lay on its side.

"She's the real deal," the semi driver said. "Twenty-five feet, and never been ridden."

Ray's tongue clove to the roof of his mouth. His heart was pounding so fast he couldn't stand it. Winston and Egon had pulled out all the stops and purchased an old friend.

Ray gaped in awe. "She's...she's beautiful," he said. "And curvy. I can't wait to try her."

 

   


 


End file.
